Produce Aisle Posturing

In the afternoon of Sunday, May 4, 2008, I happened to be doing some grocery shopping at Wegman’s in Dickson City. As I rounded out of the fruit and vegetable section into the baked goods, I bumped into Judge Munley and his wife, whom I have seen there together on several occasions. (I think it is very nice that he accompanies his wife to the store.) She is a lovely woman who, even though she is no longer a spring chicken, when you see her, you still think, “Va va voom!”

I like to make up stories about people in my head. And seeing the judge and his wife always elicits the same story line. I imagine that she is the judge’s second wife. And when I see her, I can’t help but think about his first wife. So when I see them, I always feel a little sad. I hope the first Mrs. Munley (if she exists) isn’t still bitter about the divorce.

Then a few minutes later I spotted Judge Minora shopping alone. He didn’t appear to be doing much shopping. I think all he had in his cart was a bunch of Pellegrino. I don’t know ANYTHING about him, but I made up a story anyway. He is sort of a handsome fellow, not too old, still in his prime. I imagine a man of his stature, position in life, and good looks really gets around with the ladies. And after he entertains one of his lady friends, he probably offers them a refreshing Pellegrino. I know I would be delighted and impressed.

Speaking of the ladies, a little later I noticed Judge Minora chatting with the mayor’s wife, Mrs. Doherty, in another corner of the store. The mayor’s wife, for those of you who haven’t seen her in person, is cute like a pixie and charming. I’m guessing she is bright, as well. I don’t actually know her (or any of these people for that matter).

So there she is talking with our debonair Judge Minora, which should inspire one as imaginative as me to suddenly hear a refrain from Dan Fogelberg’s song, “Same Old Lang Syne:”

“Met my old lover in the grocery store
The snow was falling Christmas eve
I stole behind her in the frozen foods
And I touched her on the sleeve.”

But it didn’t.

There was no chemistry between them, so I couldn’t make up a good story about them.

All those politicos in one place got me thinking. What were they all doing there together? Was it coincidence? My intuition tells me it was not.

I mean, obviously they were all grocery shopping, but what were the chances that they were all there at the same time? Now mind you, I haven’t gone back to test my hypothesis. But I suspect they all go on Sunday afternoons to take advantage of a secret discount for county and city workers that we know nothing about.